There will be moment in life and often in life where will be a time we are side track and lost our focus. Little do I realise it’s actually happens to me few weeks ago. I get angry easily, agitated, restless and bored. Due to this I am also angry at myself for not able to write anything that leave remarkable result in me. I’ve been tossing around day after day, asking questions why and why and I am thankful to Allah for giving me the answers.
While tossing with the issues last night, I received an email from a friend advising me to look into what have been going on lately and highlighted that both of us has allowed ourselves surrounded by negativity. We listen, we absorbed the information’s and later we digest it in our mind and accept but there is also something behind our mind telling us all the info is not true and we are contaminated by them. At the end we feel tired, restless and failed to think clearly.
I am lucky to have such a friend and luckier to received another email advising me the same. Another friend says I should spread my wings and throw all the negativity away and get back on my track. It was such a relieved to have this kind of friends and because of those feelings also I have broken my promise to someone. I have promise this person comes what may I will not disturb or get into her way just to fulfill my imaginations on my writing. I always feel free to write base on my imaginations but suddenly it becomes stagnant and disappear. But I did it yesterday; I break my promise and feel really awful of doing it. After the two wake-up call, I’ve promise myself I must pen this negativity down. I need to let it go and call again the good vibrations into my life.
For dear friends, readers and passers by, I am sure by now all of you know the topic that I wrote most in my daily entry in the blog. 90% of everything I wrote about the two young stars is my imaginations. I feel good when I imagine they are happy, they are in relationship and they do things together. Some may say I am over the hill with my imaginations and not stepping into the reality. My arguments are, will there be reality in imaginations? I’ve been told long ago everything starts from a dream. Build your dream into reality by starting a foundation. Read, convince yourself, self-esteem, build your confident are all factors to succeed. Negative bring us down and thank you gossip mongers for bringing me down for the past few weeks. I am now letting you know, you have failed to do so. I’ve wake up fresh, full of energy and be myself all over again. A bit of advice, leave the gossip column and start build up your life.
Do you actually know gossip mongers? The more hatred we throw to others, the worst hatred we will receive. Do this exercise, stand in front of a mirror, a full length mirror where we can see ourselves from head to toe, look at ourselves, scan and evaluate, ask questions and find the answers. Where we are now? What good the column have given us? Did it actually build our self-esteem? How far it benefits us? I am saying all this because I was trap in it for a while, long enough I should say.
Alhamdulillah, I found myself again, after scanning from head to toe. Do we feel good gossiping others? Are we happy when people are sad with our gossips? Look at ourselves again, picture and imagine if we are Remy Ishak or Tiz Zaqyah. What have they done to us for us to say all the bad things about them? They are part of the entertainment industry and we are part of the viewers. The easiest concept is watch if you like, turn away if you don’t. What right do we have to evaluate the person whom we don’t know at all? Did they screw up your life? Did they take away your rice bowl? Little do we realise we might be losing our rice bowl if we keep our buttock sit on the chair in front of the computer and start spreading stories about them or others. So call gossip columns is only for artist, to bad we can’t have gossip for our politicians.
It will take me pages on these issues. We spend our time telling lies to the world and start laughing. We spend time changing their faces to awful creatures, saying names and advising so and so are not suitable for each other because of their skin colour, background, education level and previous history. Who are we? Are we better than them? If we are we will not be doing this and I regret to say I am part of it not because spreading it but believing in it. It is nice seeing Remy and Tiz together with friends outside the glamour world. Seeing their pictures at the motoGP give me pleasure knowing they are happy with their own life. I want to thank another friend to for sending me an article about Remy Ishak and seeing the other side of him from the writer point of view. It has been for long I did not read this kind of write-up although I feel like strangling the writer for the first portion of the article and allow me to share what Remy says.
“’Mungkin kerana pengalaman saya selama ini. Saya bermula dari bawah. Sebelum berlakon, banyak kerja yang saya sudah buat kerana saya ini sejak usia 17 tahun sudah bekerja.
Pelbagai kerja sudah saya buat… kerja buruh, jadi kelindan lori dan kerja-kerja housekeeping di hotel. Saya tidak pernah memilih kerja kerana saya tahu, saya bukan orang senang dan saya tidak ada sijil tinggi, jadi, saya tidak boleh memilih pekerjaan.
Kerana saya bukan orang senanglah maka saya boleh meletakkan diri saya di mana-mana,’ cerita Remy, yang mula hidup di Kuala Lumpur pada zaman gawat 1998 di mana beliau berjaya mendapatkan pekerjaan di sebuah hotel.
Oleh kerana waktu itu zaman syarikat buang pekerja, jadi saya buat apa saja kerja. Dalam hotel, hanya memasak saja saya tidak pernah cuba, tapi selainnya, dari mengemas (housekeeping), jadi pelayan dan room service hingga ke butler, semuanya saya pernah kerja,’ katanya.
‘Saya tidak malu, kerana saya tahu, saya mesti berusaha dan saya percaya kita boleh ubah nasib kita jika kita punya keinginan dan niat yang betul’.
‘Walaupun saya tidak ada sijil akademik, tidak bermakna saya gagal,’ tambahnya yang mengakui bahawa penglibatannya dalam bidang perhotelan selama lima tahun itu mengajarnya berkomunikasi dengan orang ramai.”
This is what the writer says: “Satu hal yang amat saya senangi ialah beliau tidak meninggi diri dan tidak sombong seperti yang pernah dilaporkan.
Sebaliknya, Remy seorang yang suka berterus terang, sopan dan lembut dalam tutur katanya.
Ini sama sekali tidak menepati anggapan saya tentang beliau. Saya menjangkakan beliau tentu seorang lelaki macho yang agresif, kasar dan sombong”. Thank you whoever you are for saying this.”
I am sure Remy is very confident, believed things can be changed by working hard and sincere. Adversity changed him. The above is what he says and of course I am not able to verify it if anyone ask me to. But again taking it from the point of a reader he shows determination in his life. I dare say people who are in the gossip column day in day out never gone through any struggle in life maybe. Their lives full of stars, bright and shiny, will never comes a day everything will be taken away and we are lost.
I am not defending anyone here, this is my experience. It is bad, it is disgusting, and it’s nearly ruining me. I am affected because I am a reader although I try by all means to chuck everything away. My simple advice is just look into us. We are not perfect, look at our fingers, our toes and our family. We are a human being, being form by none perfect human being called our father and mother and before that husband and wife. When they met neither of them is perfect. They got married with the other half of imperfect human being. They start a life together, nothing is perfect but they learn to blend and make it perfect for their life. The result of those comes a tiny little thing call their offspring’s. They struggle to instill a value of perfectionism in them and again another imperfect human being colours the world. That is the cycle of life. Take a deep breath and think about it for while and see if we are able to see the real us and start a change.
Owned and written by : Sanaa 13/10/10
The effects of negative words.
“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”. You have no doubt heard this phrase at some time in your life, probably the most often in your childhood. Yet words do have the power to hurt us. Words are a powerful force and the powerful effects of negative words cannot be underestimated.
We all know how horrid and degrading it feels to be called insulting names or be told that we are stupid or deficient in some way. Such words may not leave actual bruises but they certainly leave marks on our psyche, helping to form the picture we hold of ourselves. If you repeatedly hear messages that you are worthless and ugly and idiotic, your subconscious will begin to believe that it is true. You will hold an image of yourself as worthless, ugly and idiotic and you will begin to see yourself only in a negative way, all because of the words someone uses to describe you. It is, of course, unacceptable that anyone should call someone else such names, but name-calling happens so regularly that the effects of those words may be overlooked. The same can be said for the words we use to describe ourselves.
Do you ever berate yourself for mistakes you make, calling yourself stupid or useless? Are you your own worst critic, never giving yourself a break? You are certainly not alone if this is the case, but you should be aware of the pervasive effects of the negative words you use against yourself. Every time you call yourself something derogatory or use negative terms such as “nothing good happens to me” or “I will never be a success”, you are helping to strengthen those beliefs about yourself. And in the process you are doing yourself a great disservice. You may perhaps never tolerate rude or sarcastic comments said to you by others, but you may not be so determined about the way you speak to yourself day in day out. Because we are constantly giving messages to ourselves, it is more vital than ever to ensure that those words you hear in your mind are as positive as possible.
The adverse effects of negative words and negative thinking are well-documented. It is not only personal insults from other people that can be damaging. Being in the company of people who frequently complain or see the bad in everything can be just as dispiriting. Such people give across a negative energy that soon infiltrates everything and everyone around them. Socialising with such people can be very trying, it is especially difficult to be in the company of anyone who actively enjoys wasting time complaining and uses negative words frequently. You probably know people like that! They cannot see the bright side or joy in any situation, even happy events.
They do not realise the insidious effect of negative words and how self-defeating their behaviour is. These people are usually very angry and feel trapped and cheated in life, keen to blame others or situations for their misfortune. This constant griping means they are no longer contributing positively to the world. Usually they are so wrapped up in complaining that they fail to realise life is passing them by. They become cynical and sometimes depressed, much of which is perpetuated by the negative words they use – in their private thoughts as well as verbally. It is no surprise when negative people become ill with some stress-related ailment or other – the mental stress they have caused themselves manifests in other parts of the body, damaging the immune system, raising blood pressure and accelerating the aging process.
Every negative word you use against yourself is potentially a deadly weapon. It has the power to slowly chip away at your dreams and ambitions, your energy and your health. It is almost like a form of self-hypnosis whereby negative words begin to program your negative behaviour for the future. This effect of negative words can be likened to a heavy, grey cloud that settles over your whole life and refuses to shift. Each negative word makes the cloud heavier and darker until it swamps your whole life zapping away any pleasure or happiness. You stop appreciating the many blessings you do have in your life and once you lack gratitude the negativity becomes even more ingrained.
If you use negative words you owe it to yourself to begin to change that pattern. Surely you deserve to live your life in a more positive way? And surely it is time to become your best friend rather than an enemy and support yourself with positivity? You are too important to waste your life due to the use of negative words and you have too much to offer the world to remain under a cloud of negativity.
Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/the-effects-of-negative-words-1455172.html#ixzz12CNSeJS4
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